What do you think of the idea that we should all be happy? Some days, yes. Some days, not so much. Why does it seem so hard? Even elusive!
Well, great news…now we have an answer! Seems it took Boston University researchers seventy-one years...really 71 years, to figure it out. BUT they assure us that finding happiness is well within our own control. Well, duh, this little tidbit alone just makes me happy!
Here’s the deal…if you hang around people who are gloomy, negative and consistently bring you down - then you are toast! The researchers basically say, "Get rid of ‘em". It’s just that simple…but probably not that easy. For more information look at the study (1).
This rings true to me. Especially at my Baby Boomer age…everyone is constantly talking about ailments. This hurts, that hurts. It’s a veritable contest of who hurts the worst. Surgeries, medicine, aches and pains. I recently noticed that when someone else’s ailments became interesting, I was officially entering the danger zone! Alert, Alert!
Then there is this school of thought that suggests people who complain all the time actually endanger your health! Wait, what? So…avoiding Debbie Downer is a good idea! Take a look at The Complain Restraint Project (2) which empowers us to shift our language to the positive.
When Christy and I started our book series, www.ReadThis.guru, seemed like a really cool web address. What we have learned from so many people during our book talks across the country is that THE GURU IS YOU! As individuals we have control over our decisions, our thoughts, our feelings, our conversations. Our first responsibility is to ourselves. Just like in life saving classes, the first lesson for all budding life guards is to determine the likelihood of not losing THEIR life while trying to save another.
What we hope is that everyone to take time for themselves for embracing, learning and believing that The Guru Is You. Own it. Live it. Enjoy it!
So in the search for happiness, let’s do our own experiment…try this:
1. Quickly write down the names of the people you spend the most time with each week; in person, on the phone, via email, text, Facetime, etc.
2. Now evaluate each on them on this basis:
Do they make you smile or laugh?
Do you look forward to talking to them?
Do find yourself getting gloomy?
3. Identify the people you don’t enjoy and begin to limit the time you spend with them.
4. Track the number of times YOU complain and decide to reduce that amount by 25%
5. Announce you are going to complain less, especially to those who complain to you.
Try it for one week and see if it works. Send me your ideas and results. We need a group to play to see if it works. I’m going to try it and will report back!
author and guru of me!